Different But Not

Mmmmmm. Eye candy.
Mmmmmm. Eye candy. You’re welcome.

Are men’s and women’s butts really that different? Looking at the problem (yes, I told you to look at it), the actual butt doesn’t look that different. They’re the same basic shape, and if both are toned and waxed, I bet I could crop a picture to show only the butt, and people wouldn’t be able to tell which was which.

But here’s the thing. I’m attracted to men. When I see a guy from behind and think he has a cute butt, I’ll probably get a little turned on (at least). If I see a girl from behind who has a cute butt, I don’t. I might be jealous that her butt is cuter than mine. I might make note of her jeans to see if I can find a pair like it (and hope they’re as flattering on me). But I don’t get turned on.

But we just agreed that butts look more or less the same regardless of the gender. So is it knowing that the butt belongs to a guy what makes the difference?

The worst part about this question is that every time I see a guy with a cute butt, I’m going to be thinking of this problem instead of enjoying his hotness. Give me a break, brain. You don’t have to ruin everything!

Prisoners May Trade Get Out Of Jail Free Cards for Student IDs

This idea is kind of giving me a panic attack and kind of giving me the urge to commit a crime.

The Nudge Wink Report

Don't do the crime if you can't...pull an all-nighter for your English 101 final. Don’t do the crime if you can’t…pull an all-nighter for your English 101 final.

Time for a pop quiz on current events, kiddies.  Which of the following statements is true?

  1. It costs a boatload of money to go to college
  2. Most Americans can’t afford to go without taking out student loans that they’ll be paying on for the rest of their natural lives and beyond
  3. It’s against the law for U.S. tax $$ to be used to pay for college tuition for criminals while in jail
  4. U.S. tax $$ will be used to pay for college for criminals while in jail
  5. All of the above

Did you choose answer # 5, “All of the above?” Good job, boys and girls!

It was recently announced that the U.S. Education Department plans to provide federal student aid so that criminals can attend college while behind bars. This would come in the form…

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A Slippery Situation

Do you ever accidentally get way too much conditioner? Like the bottle was upside down, or you accidentally squeeze too hard, and suddenly you have a handful of conditioner?

I have actually tried to put it back in the bottle before. Laugh all you want, but that stuff costs money! Especially if you get the good stuff. Using way more than I need is not only wasteful, it’s money down the drain (literally).

The only problem with trying to put it back is that, at that point, you only have one hand free. To actually get a good amount back into the bottle, you have to be able to remove the top. So what do you do? If you’ve ever tried holding the bottle with your knees to remove the lid with your free hand (all the while trying not to spill conditioner out of your other hand), then you know it doesn’t work very well. And thank goodness no one saw you try because it has to look ridiculous.

If you can’t get the lid off (and some of them don’t come off), then you’re only real option is to tip the conditioner back up and make sure that the rest of it is at the bottom of the bottle. Then, squeeze the air out without squeezing any more conditioner out. The bottle might suck some of the conditioner back in when you release the pressure.

Unfortunately, there’s a 50/50 chance this will backfire, and you’ll wind up with even more conditioner in your hand. Even if it does work, you’ll probably get conditioner all over the lid of the bottle. So you wipe it off the bottle, still have too much conditioner, give up, and plunk it on your head.

Rinse. Repeat.

Likeability in TV Characters: Is It About Appearance Or Behavior?

I’m watching a tv show that I don’t really like. I know that’s a dumb thing to do, but I wanted something on in the background. I searched, and this show is the only thing on that I can tolerate. So I’ll live with it.

Right now, I’m actually more interested in a commercial that keeps playing during the break. It’s one of those commercials that has each of the characters from the main shows on the channel doing a little snippet. Some of those people are from shows I really like. Every time it plays, it’s making me wonder why I like those shows so much better.

Is the quality really that much higher? What actually makes me dislike this show?

Then, I realized. It’s the people on the show that I don’t like. That and their behavior. I don’t like the way they talk to each other – that whole disrespectful fighting thing that’s popular now is a big turnoff for me. I don’t like the decisions they make. I don’t even like the way they dress (though really, that’s not a big deal in comparison). On the whole, though, the premise of the show isn’t the problem. The people are.

With that in mind, I’m trying to just consider their work. And while I honestly don’t think the quality is as high as on some of the shows I like, they are good at what they’re doing.

That’s making me wonder how many other decisions we make based on likeability. I know all the talk about more attractive people having it easier, but really, how big of an effect is it? How much of the dislike is because of the behavior, and how much of it is because of the appearance?

My first instinct is to say that for me it’s mostly behavior. I can enjoy joking and razzing but only when it doesn’t cross the line into rude or disrespectful.

The more I think about that, though, isn’t that another kind of appearance? The way people choose to dress and groom themselves is a big part of their appearance, yes, but how they act is part of that, too. People act differently around different people and in different situations, so usually, it’s the behavior that’s consistent that most interests me – the parts of their behavior that stay the same no matter where they are and who they’re with.

The problem with a show is that you only see the people for a short period of time in the same circumstance. Even on cooking or home renovation shows where the people are supposedly acting like themselves, you don’t know how much is real and how much is how they behave for the camera. So if an actor or director could figure out the appearance and behavior that appeals to the most people, they’d have a really good chance for a hit.

Which explains why so many of the characters on shows are so similar. It also explain why there are a lot of shows I don’t like. So long as they think that behavior will sell, there will be shows that emphasize it. I guess I’m going to have limited viewing options until trends change.

Long Car-ride Games: a New Challenge

Did you forget that people can see through the windows?
Long drives demand new games!

Tired of the same-old games for long car rides? Bored with punch-buggies or going through the alphabet with road signs? Well, why not try to see how many drivers you can see picking their noses?

I was going to say texting (don’t text and drive!), but I see this way too often – more often that I want to because, really, who wants to see that? It’s like people forget that other people can see through their windows. I’ve also seen people sticking their fingers in their ears, eating with a spoon, playing instruments, and changing clothes. Honestly, you could make a list of weird things and check off who sees other drivers doing that. Road bingo.

Anyone else have any good stories about weird things you’ve seen people do while driving?

“She Thought Her Heart Would Explode”

As a child reading about people getting so upset that they thought they would explode, I thought it was an exaggeration. Or that the character was being excessively dramatic. Reading those sorts of scenes after having anxiety attacks and panic attacks, I have a totally different understanding of the situation.

When the book says the character felt like their heart would explode from their chest, I know exactly how that feels. That’s a main part of what anxiety and panic feel like. It’s that same kind of feeling in your chest that you get when you watch a scary movie. That energy like you need to run away only there’s nothing there to run from. And the beating of your heart is so strong that it’s almost painful and definitely scary.

I wonder how many other things I dismiss as being dramatic that are really close to someone else’s reality.